Funny Funny Story


MI.Net Member
Mar 20, 2004
After 17 years of marriage, a man dumped his wife for his young
Secretary. His new girlfriend demanded that she wanted to live
in the couple's multimillion dollar home, and since the man's
lawyers were a little better, he prevailed. He gave his now ex-wife
just 3 days to move out.

She spent the first day packing her belongings into boxes, crates
and suitcases.

On the second day, she had the movers come and collect her things.

On the third day, she sat down for the last time at their beautiful
dining room table by candlelight, put on some soft background
music, and feasted on a pound of shrimp, a jar of caviar, and a
bottle of Chardonnay.

When she had finished, she went into each and every room and
deposited a few half-eaten shrimp shells, dipped in caviar, into the
hollow of the curtain rods. She then cleaned up the kitchen and left.

When the husband returned with his new girlfriend, all was bliss
for the first few days. Then slowly, the house began to smell. They
tried everything; cleaning &mopping and airing the place out.
Vents were checked for dead rodents, and carpets were steam
cleaned. Air fresheners were hung everywhere.

Exterminators were brought in to set off gas canisters, during which
they had to move out for a few days, and in the end they even paid to
replace the expensive wool carpeting.

Nothing worked. People stopped coming over to visit... Repairmen
refused to work in the house...The maid quit...

Finally, they could not take the stench any longer and decided to move.

A month later, even though they had cut their price in half, they could
not find a buyer for their stinky house. Word got out, and eventually,
even the local realtors refused to return their calls.

Finally, they had to borrow a huge sum of money from the bank to
purchase a new place.

The ex-wife called the man, and asked how things were going.
He told her the saga of the rotting house. She listened politely, and
said that she missed her old home terribly, and would be willing to
reduce her divorce settlement in exchange for getting the house back...

Knowing his ex-wife had no idea how bad the smell was, he agreed on
a price that was about 1/10th of what the house had been worth... But
only if she were to sign the papers that very day. She agreed, and
within the hour, his lawyers delivered the paperwork.

A week later, the man and his new girlfriend stood smirking as they
watched the moving company pack everything to take to their new home...

...including the curtain rods.

I love a happy ending, don't you???
Yoh, revenge is a dish best eaten cold, and smelly?
lolb; lolb; lolb; rid: rid:
something fishy about this story :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

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