- Joined
- Feb 18, 2012
- Messages
- 21
- Points
- 4
The New Tommy Atkins (with apologies to Kipling)
Submitted by Billy Little
Author Unknown
They flew me `ome from Baghdad with a bullet in my chest
Cos they`ve closed the army `ospitals I`m in the NHS
The nurse she ain`t no Britisher an` so she ain`t impressed
It`s like I`m some street corner thug who`s come off second best
Yes, it`s Tommy, this an` Tommy that an` “You`re not welcome `ere”
But when Saddam was collar`d they were quick enough to cheer
They`re proud when Tommy Atkins `olds the thin red line out there
But now he`s wounded back at `ome he has to wait for care
Some stranger in the next bed sez “Don`t you feel no shame?
You kill my muslim brothers!” So it`s me not `im to blame!
An` then the cleaner ups an` sez “Who are you fighting for?
It ain`t for Queen and country `cos it`s Bush`s bloody war!”
It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that an` “Tommy what`s that smell?
But it`s “God go with you Tommy” when they fly us out to `ell
O then we`re just like `eroes from the army`s glorious past
Yes it`s “God go with you Tommy” when the trip might be your last
They pays us skivvy wages never mind we`re sitting ducks
When clerks what`s pushing pens at `ome don`t know their flippin` luck
“Ah yes” sez they “but think of all the travel to be `ad”
Pull the other one, does cooks do `olidays in Baghdad?
It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that an` Tommy know your place
But it`s Tommy take the front seat when there`s terrorists to chase
An` the town is full of maniacs who`d like you dead toot sweet
Yes it`s “Thank you Mr Atkins” when they find you in the street
There`s s`pposed to be a covynant to treat us fair an` square
But I `ad to buy me army boots an` me combats is threadbare
An` `alf the bloody `elicopters can`t get in the air
An` me pistol jammed when snipers fired that’s why I`m laid up `ere
Yes It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that “We `ave to watch the pence”
Bold as brass the PM sez “We spare them no expense”
But I`II tell you when they do us proud an` pull out all the stops
It`s when Tommy lands at Lyneham in a bloomin` wooden box!
Submitted by Billy Little
Author Unknown
They flew me `ome from Baghdad with a bullet in my chest
Cos they`ve closed the army `ospitals I`m in the NHS
The nurse she ain`t no Britisher an` so she ain`t impressed
It`s like I`m some street corner thug who`s come off second best
Yes, it`s Tommy, this an` Tommy that an` “You`re not welcome `ere”
But when Saddam was collar`d they were quick enough to cheer
They`re proud when Tommy Atkins `olds the thin red line out there
But now he`s wounded back at `ome he has to wait for care
Some stranger in the next bed sez “Don`t you feel no shame?
You kill my muslim brothers!” So it`s me not `im to blame!
An` then the cleaner ups an` sez “Who are you fighting for?
It ain`t for Queen and country `cos it`s Bush`s bloody war!”
It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that an` “Tommy what`s that smell?
But it`s “God go with you Tommy” when they fly us out to `ell
O then we`re just like `eroes from the army`s glorious past
Yes it`s “God go with you Tommy” when the trip might be your last
They pays us skivvy wages never mind we`re sitting ducks
When clerks what`s pushing pens at `ome don`t know their flippin` luck
“Ah yes” sez they “but think of all the travel to be `ad”
Pull the other one, does cooks do `olidays in Baghdad?
It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that an` Tommy know your place
But it`s Tommy take the front seat when there`s terrorists to chase
An` the town is full of maniacs who`d like you dead toot sweet
Yes it`s “Thank you Mr Atkins” when they find you in the street
There`s s`pposed to be a covynant to treat us fair an` square
But I `ad to buy me army boots an` me combats is threadbare
An` `alf the bloody `elicopters can`t get in the air
An` me pistol jammed when snipers fired that’s why I`m laid up `ere
Yes It`s Tommy this an` Tommy that “We `ave to watch the pence”
Bold as brass the PM sez “We spare them no expense”
But I`II tell you when they do us proud an` pull out all the stops
It`s when Tommy lands at Lyneham in a bloomin` wooden box!