Zofo
02-05-04, 23:00
Reaction to Snakes
• Civilian: Runs away from the snake screaming.
• Paratrooper:Lands on and kills the snake.
• Armour: runs over snake, giggles, and looks for more snakes.
• Army Air Corps: Has GPS grid to snake. Can't find snake. Back to base for crew rest and the club and some sort of drink called "The Snake."
• Marine: Plays with the snake, then eats it.
• Army Legal Office: Advises the snake on the rules of engagement and the law of war as it pertains to the snake and its defensive posture.
• Quartermaster: Captures snake and applies a National Stock Number to it. Implements a Found On Installation (FOI) procedure and picks up snake on property book. Has company commander sign hand receipt for "Snake, Green, One Each," as non-expendable unit property.
• Navy SEAL: Expends all ammunition, several grenades and calls for naval gunfire in a failed attempt to kill the snake. The snake bites the SEAL then retreats to safety.
• Artillery: Kills snake, but in the process kills several hundred civilians with a massive TOT with three FA BDEs in support. Mission is considered a success and all participants (cooks, mechanics, clerks) are awarded Silver Stars.
• Marine Recon: Follows the snake and gets lost.
• Pathfinder: Guides the snake elsewhere.
• Fighter Pilot: Mis-identifies the snake as a Russian HIND helicopter and engages it with missiles. Crew chief paints a snake on airplane.
• Army Medic: Wounds the snake in first encounter, then feverishly works to save the snake's life.
• SAS: Makes contact with the snake, builds rapport, wins its heart and mind, then trains it to kill other snakes.
• Civilian: Runs away from the snake screaming.
• Paratrooper:Lands on and kills the snake.
• Armour: runs over snake, giggles, and looks for more snakes.
• Army Air Corps: Has GPS grid to snake. Can't find snake. Back to base for crew rest and the club and some sort of drink called "The Snake."
• Marine: Plays with the snake, then eats it.
• Army Legal Office: Advises the snake on the rules of engagement and the law of war as it pertains to the snake and its defensive posture.
• Quartermaster: Captures snake and applies a National Stock Number to it. Implements a Found On Installation (FOI) procedure and picks up snake on property book. Has company commander sign hand receipt for "Snake, Green, One Each," as non-expendable unit property.
• Navy SEAL: Expends all ammunition, several grenades and calls for naval gunfire in a failed attempt to kill the snake. The snake bites the SEAL then retreats to safety.
• Artillery: Kills snake, but in the process kills several hundred civilians with a massive TOT with three FA BDEs in support. Mission is considered a success and all participants (cooks, mechanics, clerks) are awarded Silver Stars.
• Marine Recon: Follows the snake and gets lost.
• Pathfinder: Guides the snake elsewhere.
• Fighter Pilot: Mis-identifies the snake as a Russian HIND helicopter and engages it with missiles. Crew chief paints a snake on airplane.
• Army Medic: Wounds the snake in first encounter, then feverishly works to save the snake's life.
• SAS: Makes contact with the snake, builds rapport, wins its heart and mind, then trains it to kill other snakes.